Monday, November 18, 2013
This is our autism
Written by Her Lucky Mother, 11/2013, Massachusetts USA
This is our autism.
Our autism is the youngest child who made our family complete; the one my heart knew needed to be with us.
It is a little girl bursting with energy and jumping, spinning, and running her way through life.
It is the tight grip on her little hand because the world is so fascinating that safety doesn’t override “see, touch, do, go”. It is faith that someday safety will have its place in her thought process, but the wonder and curiosity will never fade away.
It is contagious laughter at things the rest of us forgot were so darn funny.
Our autism is tight hugs, pressure seeking feet pushing into my thigh, hands that revel in Daddy’s whiskers, weighted blankets, crashing, bouncing, and lots of tickles.It is the joys of motion, whether swinging to the heavens, splashing in the water, or turning somersaults on the lawn.
It is hellos that are sometimes ignored, smiles in photographs that are seldom looking at the camera, and comfortable holiday garb because itchy and restrictive is a no-no. But it is honest, present, and full of integrity.
It is always listening, because communication is everywhere in countless forms. It is guessing, and second guessing.
It is overwhelmed by too much activity, too many people, too much to look at. It is knowing when it’s time for a break.
Our autism is respecting the stim. It is scripting, flapping, wiggly feet, watching the same television show or playing the same app again and again and again…
It is sisters who are blessed with a relationship that teaches them about diversity, compassion, and humanity.
It is worrying. It is trying to trust the people who support this little girl who can’t always tell her own stories. It is hoping they love her like you do, hoping they “get” her. It is fighting for her and eventually teaching her to fight for herself.
It is expecting the unexpected. It’s never a dull moment. It is being careful when you look away, because anything can happen.
It is doing what works and forgetting the timetables and traditions. It is following your gut and giving her what she needs, even as the rest of the world rolls their eyes.
It is deep, meaningful conversations from just a few words. It is hearing my name as the sweetest sound on Earth. It is amazement at the precious gift of every syllable. Our autism is endless possibilities. It is never saying never. It is focusing on strengths instead of weaknesses.
It is fascinating and confusing, it is a learning curve but a fantastic teacher. It is work but it is worth it.
Our autism is more than I could ever put into words in one place. It is the unique and wonderful girl curled up beside me as I type.
This is our autism, and it is beautiful.